Fake Criterion Covers

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Guido · #326 Post by **Guido** » Wed Jun 04, 2008 11:23 pm

#327 Post by **domino harvey** » Wed Jun 04, 2008 11:24 pm

tavernier · #328 Post by **tavernier** » Wed Jun 04, 2008 11:25 pm

That would sell better than Klein.

Michael Shetina · Wed Jun 04, 2008 11:49 pm

Perhaps you should have misspelled 'delirious'' in keeping with the theme.

PimpPanda · #330 Post by **PimpPanda** » Thu Jun 05, 2008 1:21 am

Guido · #331 Post by **Guido** » Thu Jun 05, 2008 1:51 am

Nice choice PimpPanda; I've always loved that Nostalghia poster. One more Godard, then that's it.

Feego · #332 Post by **Feego** » Thu Jun 05, 2008 3:52 am

HerrSchreck · #333 Post by **HerrSchreck** » Thu Jun 05, 2008 3:57 am

Guido wrote:Nice choice PimpPanda; I've always loved that Nostalghia poster. One more Godard, then that's it.

I've never seen the movie, so I cant say whats going on there, but it looks like he's shooting a razor-straight jet of wang wine straight outa his zipper at the girl.

What is that line?

M · #334 Post by M » Thu Jun 05, 2008 4:06 am

HerrSchreck wrote:I've never seen the movie, so I cant say whats going on there, but it looks like he's shooting a razor-straight jet of wang wine straight outa his zipper at the girl.

What is that line?

Unclear, but he already got that girl laying face down to his right.

HerrSchreck · #335 Post by **HerrSchreck** » Thu Jun 05, 2008 4:08 am

Not to mention the cars 'n stuff he's also clearly just blown up with his Atomic Prostate Laser Power...

That girl is doomed... you can even see her looking down, tracking the progress of Approaching Doom..

Guido · #336 Post by **Guido** » Thu Jun 05, 2008 4:23 am

I've never seen the movie, so I cant say whats going on there, but it looks like he's shooting a razor-straight jet of wang wine straight outa his zipper at the girl.

I HAVE seen the movie, and you're absolutely right. It's not even the best part of the film.

HerrSchreck · #337 Post by **HerrSchreck** » Thu Jun 05, 2008 5:38 am

Guido wrote:
I've never seen the movie, so I cant say whats going on there, but it looks like he's shooting a razor-straight jet of wang wine straight outa his zipper at the girl.
I HAVE seen the movie, and you're absolutely right. It's not even the best part of the film.

I'm glad I'm absolutely right.. but what am I absolutely right about? That he kills people with thin sharp blasts of his warm Chateau Neuf de Peter?

jt · #338 Post by jt » Thu Jun 05, 2008 11:21 am

Woo hoo! Embarrassingly, this piece of shit took me 45 min. 10 min of pissing about in excel, 20 min to find a font slightly like the wacky c and 15 min figuring out how to post an image to the forum. Swimminghorses, consider me your first disciple...

M · #339 Post by M » Thu Jun 05, 2008 1:01 pm

'Thou shalt not place the title directly underneath the Criterion logo.'

Add that to 'thou shalt not include blue monkeys on Tarkovsky covers.'

HerrSchreck · #340 Post by **HerrSchreck** » Thu Jun 05, 2008 1:06 pm

Additionally:

"All blacks-- if 'black'-- must be Black."

GringoTex · #341 Post by **GringoTex** » Thu Jun 05, 2008 2:01 pm

Guido wrote:Nice choice PimpPanda; I've always loved that Nostalghia poster. One more Godard, then that's it.

A black and white Weekend cover is ridiculous.

Sebastian · #342 Post by **Sebastian** » Thu Jun 05, 2008 2:04 pm

jorencain · #343 Post by **jorencain** » Thu Jun 05, 2008 2:22 pm

GringoTex wrote:A black and white Weekend cover is ridiculous.

My thoughts exactly.

denti alligator · Thu Jun 05, 2008 4:40 pm

Sebastian wrote:

Nice.

Guido · #345 Post by **Guido** » Thu Jun 05, 2008 5:33 pm

A black and white Weekend cover is ridiculous.

Here is the corrected version:

This is an homage, swimminghorses - please don't contact your lawyer. (And no, I would not be opposed to some kind of merger. I'm not so sure it'd benefit the forum though.)

oldsheperd · #346 Post by **oldsheperd** » Thu Jun 05, 2008 5:52 pm

What's with the halfpipe house on the cover of Un Chien Andalou? I totally wanna live there and skate that ramp.

GringoTex · #347 Post by **GringoTex** » Thu Jun 05, 2008 6:13 pm

Guido wrote:
A black and white Weekend cover is ridiculous.
Here is the corrected version:

Much better.

The Glue Man · #348 Post by **The Glue Man** » Thu Jun 05, 2008 7:17 pm

First attempt *prepares himself*

Cinephrenic · #349 Post by **Cinephrenic** » Thu Jun 05, 2008 8:23 pm

Was that a solar or lunar eclipse?

tavernier · #350 Post by **tavernier** » Thu Jun 05, 2008 8:24 pm

That's not an Eclipse cover -- it's got the wacky C.

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